7.31.2012


Summer's taking it easy on me tonight, sitting on the rug with the breeze from the rotating fan catching me every 15 seconds or so. I just put on an old Kurt Vile record that reminds me so much of when we first moved into this apartment a year ago. It reminds me of sitting beneath this rug, on the floor, before I ever found the jute thing on Craigslist, before there was any of our furniture at all.

It's hard for me to listen to music that once meant so much—I guess, because it still means so much. It's of a certain time, and, although I'm a big fan of change, I can't wrap my head around time passing. Instead of the years building up and accumulating and becoming this life, I feel like mine is a book of short stories, cohesive only in the way that they're created by the same author.

As Kurt sings, and I so easily relate: "I don't know if it's real, but it's how I feel."

7 comments:

  1. Beautiful, Jessica.

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  2. love when a specific song does that.

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  3. i know how you feel.

    i hope life is bringing you new, wonderful things!

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  4. I love this idea that life can feel like a series of short stories rather than one big book. One big change can change all the characters, setting and plot. Lovely image, beautiful writing.

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  5. Beautiful words, Jessica. I love this! :)

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  6. Oh I can relate to that feeling so well. It's beautiful how you said your life is like a book of short stories, and that songs belong to each story and are painful to listen to if in a different story. It makes me sad, but in a good way I suppose.

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  7. this happens to me sometimes as well. even when what I am recalling is a beautiful memory, but just the thing that it belongs to the past and i will never live it again makes me feel melancholic when I listen to the song that brought me the memory...
    really beautiful what you wrote!

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